Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Journal November 8-21st, 07

November 8th, 07
Well I got up this morning and I had to weigh because I was so frustrated yesterday...I'm not sure what I was hoping for...maybe for it to say that I was 100 lbs less than what I am...HAHAHA...but it did go down which I was very happy about and that's all I needed. I got up today and worked out pretty hard even though I'm drained and wanted to sleep all day to make up for the sleep I missed the night before but I'm determined to get this weight off of me..and the longer I lay in bed makes it that much longer before it vanishes. Today I am very proud of myself I brought pretty much a whole pizza home for the hubby last night and I haven't touched it...DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS????? Maybe you don't because you may not be tempted by food...but food to me is like alcohol to the alcoholic or smoking to the person who is trying to quit...maybe that will help you understand. But anyways I'm good...not touching it...I know it is not worth it! Its just not worth it for the work that has to be done to get it off of my fat self. Well its still the middle of the day and I have lots to do before going to work. Lord thank you again for this street stay stong and anyone else reading this and help me to stay on track. Tonight Chris and I are going to applebees please don't let me chose the wrong thing...keep up the good can do are stronger than this you have an advantage God is on your side pulling for you!!!
note-Chris and I went out and I ordered healthy and only ate half of the meal YAY!

November 9th, 07
Well today is going good so far, it is only the afternoon so I have a lot of the day left but I'm doing okay. I have already worked out. And that box of pizza is still in the fridge and I have not touched it. There is also my favorite candy bar sitting on the table that I walk by about a million times a day times a day and I have not touched it. I finished my left overs from dinner yesterday today.(Yeah surprise I actually had food left over from last night) So today is good. I'm not sure what else to type for now so see you later.

November 10, 07
It's the afternoon again. I'm currently watching the UofM game against Wisconsin and it not looking so good but its still early in the game. Last night Chris and I went bowling with friends, then went out to eat. I only ordered a half size oriental chicken salad from applebees...yes I am proud of my self again. Its great I'm doing good. Using the small plates is really helping me I mean I can fill the plate but not be over eating and I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything because the plate is full. Maybe I'm crazy but that's just how my mind works. Well I'm going to get back to the game that we are losing! byebye for now! Lord help me through this day! Let me be a light for you!

November 11, 07
I'm getting ready to go to work but I promised myself that I would write in this thing everyday so here I am. I have not yet worked out today, no excuses but I had church this morning, I should have worked out after church but honestly I just felt like relaxing which I'm sure I'm going to kick myself in the butt for later since I will now be exercising tonight when I get home. So today I made a HUGE salad. And after taking a few bites I just didn't want any more. Yeah I know it wasteful but I threw it away, funny but i'm proud of myself for that. Normally since I made a huge salad I would just sit and eat the whole thing but insted I stopped once I had had enough and just threw the rest away. So yay me again today! Yes I am my own personal cheer leader so you can laugh at me but I have to be who else is going to recognize all the small stuff and cheer me on. I know I loos like an idiot when I say yay me but its how I feel, because only I know how hard it is for me to take these little steps so apparently only I can cheer me on for these small things. Lord thank you for your word this morning. Even though I am currently no a mom I learned so much fomr the teaching today. Maybe you wanted Chris and I to hear that before blessing us with the responsibility of placing another life into our hands. Thank you for being you! You are amazing God. I couldn't make it through each day with out you! I love you and pray that you use me today in any way you see fit. I praise you. Thank you for everything. With you all things are possible! So I know that one day I will be at my goal and what seemed to be impossible will all be made possible through you my Lord!

November 12th, 07
I don't have but a few minute to write today. I had a meeting at work this morning I came home had lunch worked out and now I'm typring but I still have to get in the shower so this shall be short and sweet. I did not work out last night when I got home from work. I had full intentions to do so but didn't get to it. I didn't get out of work till late and I was completely wore out. I did play football and basketball with the boys so maybe that could count as at least something but I didn't actually do my set aside work out time because the time I set aside was after work and I got out or work too late so I should have worked out before work. I'm still doing good with food so I just have to keep on this positive track. Thank you God for your blessings! Keep me strong!

November 13th, 07
Its early again getting ready to take a shower and get ready for work. Worked out this morning didn't sleep well till this morning because I was angry about something stupid. I'm doing well though. We had taco bell again last night and I again just ate Chris' left over tacos. I am very irritable today and Im not 100% sure why but I am. Hopefully I don't let it get in the way. I worked out this morning and added weights to a couple of the routines and my arms are killing which is a GREAT thing! Yeah sounds crazy that I am happy about the pain but pain is weakness leaving the body and it just tells me that I worked out hard today! Well I have to get going. Lord help me to stop being grumpy today. Let me shine your light and be a witness for you. You are Amazing God! By the way tomorrow is weigh day...please Lord let it be good I have been doing everything that I'm suppose to!

November 14th, 07
So today I'm SOOOO HAPPY!!! I lost 5.8 lbs this week YAY ME!!! Its finally coming off! This hard work is starting to show thank God! I'm in a hurry today so I don't have much time to write. But this is the motivation I needed this is my third week doing this and its finally showing. I'm not quite sure how I would have handled it if I didn't see at least something this week. I mean I would have kept on keeping on, but I would have been very discouraged. But YAY...lets keep it up! THANK YOU LORD!

November 15th, 07
I just got done with my work out and I'm feeling great. I worke up so late today though, probably because we went grocery shopping last night but still waking up late throw my whole schedule off in the mornings. It makes me have to rush to get things done, and it just gives me an excuse not to exercise...however I didn't use that excuse it just made me start the exercise much sooner because I was thinking you have no choice you HAVE to exercise so you better get moving! Gosh its nice to have my mind set this way. I defintely see that this is not a temporary fix, but a life time of change. Thank God that I'm realizing this now and not ten or more years from now. Being my mind set is changing now means I can instill this in my children and they wont use food for nothing more than fuel to their bodies. God knew I needed to change myself before I could be a good parent, and now that my mindest is changing I'm becoming more prepared every day. God help me through this day. In your name! AMEN! Also Chris and I are going to applebees know our normal thursday evening routine, lord give me strength to order healthy and to control my portions...THANK YOU!!!

November 16th, 07
Well today mom came into town YAY!!! We didn't go to applebees last night but we went today and mom and I split something! Today is great. I'm not going to spend much time on here because I want to spend time with my mom. See you tomorrow.

November 17th, 07
Today mom and I are going shopping. Oh and last night my AWESOME HUBBY got me a new protable DVD play. He is just great! We are doing lots today so I'm not sure how much I will get to write today. Bye for now!
Well today went great I made a huge dinner and only had the proper amount. I also turned down a cinabon! Yeah I'm doing awesome. Plus walked through the mall without getting tired and had energy to spare. Came home and did 2 workouts...yep Im on a roll...and yep I still have rolls Hey gotta laught at yourself soemtimes! God is good!

November 18th, 07
Wow I cannot believe that Thanksgiving is this week! Its crazy! Today has been great. I love spending time with my mom she is the greatest! It is so gerat that she has noticed my eating habits have changed and she is proud of me. It makes this ten times better. Life is Good! God thank you!

November 19th, 07
Today mom is going home but we had a great time. We looked through lots of exercixe videos and I realized that I have a long way to go I could harly keep up with them and then I was getting frustrated about it. Oh well at least I tried right. We worked out together and then mom headed back to Flint and I headed to work. Tomorrow is weigh day dont' forget...and keep you head up no matter what the scale says!

November 20th, 07
Well its early still and I just weighed. I lost one more pound. And I know one isn't a lot but its something and I'm happy about it. I can't sit and think gosh I have sooo much weight to lose, what does one pound mean. But it means a lot. First off I didn't gain and second off the scale went down which makes me happy. I'm working hard and its finally starting to show even if the scale isn't drastically dropping. Jsut got to think of it as one pound at a time. Not that I don't wish that I had lost 10 lbs but if I did that means I would have been doing something I couldn't keep up, at least that is the way it usually is. If you have a large weight loss in a short amount of time its usually through something that is not a life change but just a temporary one that you cannot keep up or is not healthy. But I feel that what I'm going through is a life change and therefore this weight is not going to return! Tomorrow is thankgiving and we are making a huge thanksgiving dinner for the boys tomorrow. Lord help me keep controlled and don't let me fall into temptation.

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